Thursday, June 19, 2008
Sometimes I wonder how far I should take it with this blog. I mean, this blog is anonymous, but yet I know that three girl friends read it because I told them what the url is and they are my closest friends - which means a lot since I am quite anti-social and have many contacts but few real friends (I'm weird that way).
I know one guy whose blog I follow reads mine, and has even listed me in his blog reads (I'm touched btw).. and based on what I read in his blog, I like the fellow.
Then there's one other guy who was a potential fuck buddy and that's all he's ever been, a potential... and I think he might have read my blog once in a blue moon.
Then there's Him.
And that's about it... the ones I know read my blog. I get emailed comments now and again by strangers - some nice, others downright bitchy (but who the fuck cares?).. but I don't really know who reads this blog (assuming I actually do have a number of readers).
So maybe, I can take the contents of this blog further... sexually, that is.
But, because i know my girl friends read my blog, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with them knowing too many details about my sex life. Just imagine, i blog about, for EXAMPLE, a threesome I had, and the next day I meet those friends. Will I feel embarrassed? Or worse, will they condemn me for the lifestyle I have chosen?
I'll like to think that they accept me for who I am, but then again, morals and social conventions are funny things.
I'm not pondering this issue because I'm thinking, "oohh, let's up my readership." (Though I think dear Mr Baba will enjoy such posts, lol, half his listed blog readings are kinda explicit) It's just that sometimes, I have encounters which I am just bursting to share about because they were either damn mind-blowing, or so lousy the guy in question should not be allowed to live.
And I do enjoy a spot of erotic writing now and again.
Maybe, I'll just go with the flow... write what I feel like writing. That was the whole point of this blog being anonymous after all, so I'm not constrained.
So ya.. let's start with (coz I'm itching to announce it): I had a most active evening about 1-2 weeks ago with three most attentive gentlemen... my body was aching after it. I can be quite sexually-hungry sometimes when the horny bug strikes and one's not enough (unless he's high on red bull). So three at one go... three gentlemen who were totally respectful, attentive, and sensitive... that was most wonderful.
Some might be thinking now, "What a slut!" But you see, if you're thinking that, then it's just because we follow different sex schools of thought. Some believe in sex only in a marriage and that's fine by me. Some of you believe in pre-martial sex; good for you. And others take it even further like me and are comfortable with concepts like a foursome, gangbang, swinging, various sex toys and games, roleplay and so on.
Whatever it is, good for you.
For me, I believe very strongly that a female should not have to apologise for being sexual and sensual. A female's sex life should not be dictated by social 'norms'. If she wants to get involved in some sort of sexual act, then she should go for it because she has every right to 'follow her heart' so to speak and satisfy herself.
It's like.. why is it in a way acceptable for a male to be sexually active, and be free to explore different things, but not so for a female? Why do people only shake their heads at a man having pre-martial sex (as an example) while a woman who does so is seen as loose and insulted? Don't both genders have sexual organs and the ability to orgasm? So why are they judged on different platforms? And what's worse is that some extremely sexually promiscuous men like to judge women who are the slighest bit promiscuous - I don't see the logic in that.
I'm very tired over how women are told they have to suppress their needs and desires and just, be. It's unfair and humiliating. Women should not have to be afraid to do as they please.
So men, if you want to judge me, I don't care for you reading for my blog. Ladies, my dearest friends, I hope you understand me a little better.
And if you've thoughts you wanna share with me on this, email me... I enjoy a good conversation.
I know one guy whose blog I follow reads mine, and has even listed me in his blog reads (I'm touched btw).. and based on what I read in his blog, I like the fellow.
Then there's one other guy who was a potential fuck buddy and that's all he's ever been, a potential... and I think he might have read my blog once in a blue moon.
Then there's Him.
And that's about it... the ones I know read my blog. I get emailed comments now and again by strangers - some nice, others downright bitchy (but who the fuck cares?).. but I don't really know who reads this blog (assuming I actually do have a number of readers).
So maybe, I can take the contents of this blog further... sexually, that is.
But, because i know my girl friends read my blog, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with them knowing too many details about my sex life. Just imagine, i blog about, for EXAMPLE, a threesome I had, and the next day I meet those friends. Will I feel embarrassed? Or worse, will they condemn me for the lifestyle I have chosen?
I'll like to think that they accept me for who I am, but then again, morals and social conventions are funny things.
I'm not pondering this issue because I'm thinking, "oohh, let's up my readership." (Though I think dear Mr Baba will enjoy such posts, lol, half his listed blog readings are kinda explicit) It's just that sometimes, I have encounters which I am just bursting to share about because they were either damn mind-blowing, or so lousy the guy in question should not be allowed to live.
And I do enjoy a spot of erotic writing now and again.
Maybe, I'll just go with the flow... write what I feel like writing. That was the whole point of this blog being anonymous after all, so I'm not constrained.
So ya.. let's start with (coz I'm itching to announce it): I had a most active evening about 1-2 weeks ago with three most attentive gentlemen... my body was aching after it. I can be quite sexually-hungry sometimes when the horny bug strikes and one's not enough (unless he's high on red bull). So three at one go... three gentlemen who were totally respectful, attentive, and sensitive... that was most wonderful.
Some might be thinking now, "What a slut!" But you see, if you're thinking that, then it's just because we follow different sex schools of thought. Some believe in sex only in a marriage and that's fine by me. Some of you believe in pre-martial sex; good for you. And others take it even further like me and are comfortable with concepts like a foursome, gangbang, swinging, various sex toys and games, roleplay and so on.
Whatever it is, good for you.
For me, I believe very strongly that a female should not have to apologise for being sexual and sensual. A female's sex life should not be dictated by social 'norms'. If she wants to get involved in some sort of sexual act, then she should go for it because she has every right to 'follow her heart' so to speak and satisfy herself.
It's like.. why is it in a way acceptable for a male to be sexually active, and be free to explore different things, but not so for a female? Why do people only shake their heads at a man having pre-martial sex (as an example) while a woman who does so is seen as loose and insulted? Don't both genders have sexual organs and the ability to orgasm? So why are they judged on different platforms? And what's worse is that some extremely sexually promiscuous men like to judge women who are the slighest bit promiscuous - I don't see the logic in that.
I'm very tired over how women are told they have to suppress their needs and desires and just, be. It's unfair and humiliating. Women should not have to be afraid to do as they please.
So men, if you want to judge me, I don't care for you reading for my blog. Ladies, my dearest friends, I hope you understand me a little better.
And if you've thoughts you wanna share with me on this, email me... I enjoy a good conversation.
Tags
What disappoints you the most?
Love
Where will you go if someone sponsors you a tour ticket?
Europe – EVERY single country in the EU
What’s your favorite thing to do?
Sex, eating, drinking, reading, watching plays
Do you think money can buy happiness?
Depends on how you define happiness… but whatever it is, money sure helps a lot
If you can have one dream to come true, what would it be?
That I have unlimited resources to run orphanages and shelters for unwed mothers worldwide.
Do you believe you can survive without money?
Of course not, we’re in SG you know
What are you afraid to lose the most?
The ability to respect myself
If you win $1 million, what would you do?
10% to the church, 10% for my bro’s education, 70% for my parents, remainder for me to invest.
What color represents you the most?
Blue
List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you?
Witty, a rare good flirt, has a heart, or at least something resembling a heart
What makes you happy?
Gee, that depends on whether I’m pms-ing or not, doesn’t it?
What type of person do you hate the most?
Selfish pompous aresholes
Where do you see yourself 10 years down the road?
Successful career, travelling all over the world, with my own private apartment (either SOHO-type or a B&W colonial type)
If you could have a superpower, what would it be?
To persuade people to do whatever I want
What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
Being true to myself
Any childhood memories you’ll like to re-live?
Visiting Changi Europa when I was a little girl with my parents – we went there very often to listen to the band coz we lived just across the road from it… great fish & chips!
What makes you cry?
Lots of things! My favourite though, is crying coz of really really spicy sambal belachan
What is your least favourite animal?
Selfish Singaporean
What is one thing your friends probably don’t know about you?
If I told you, it won’t be a secret anymore, will it?
Tagging: Everyone bored enough to do so.. drop me a note if you do it
Love
Where will you go if someone sponsors you a tour ticket?
Europe – EVERY single country in the EU
What’s your favorite thing to do?
Sex, eating, drinking, reading, watching plays
Do you think money can buy happiness?
Depends on how you define happiness… but whatever it is, money sure helps a lot
If you can have one dream to come true, what would it be?
That I have unlimited resources to run orphanages and shelters for unwed mothers worldwide.
Do you believe you can survive without money?
Of course not, we’re in SG you know
What are you afraid to lose the most?
The ability to respect myself
If you win $1 million, what would you do?
10% to the church, 10% for my bro’s education, 70% for my parents, remainder for me to invest.
What color represents you the most?
Blue
List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you?
Witty, a rare good flirt, has a heart, or at least something resembling a heart
What makes you happy?
Gee, that depends on whether I’m pms-ing or not, doesn’t it?
What type of person do you hate the most?
Selfish pompous aresholes
Where do you see yourself 10 years down the road?
Successful career, travelling all over the world, with my own private apartment (either SOHO-type or a B&W colonial type)
If you could have a superpower, what would it be?
To persuade people to do whatever I want
What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
Being true to myself
Any childhood memories you’ll like to re-live?
Visiting Changi Europa when I was a little girl with my parents – we went there very often to listen to the band coz we lived just across the road from it… great fish & chips!
What makes you cry?
Lots of things! My favourite though, is crying coz of really really spicy sambal belachan
What is your least favourite animal?
Selfish Singaporean
What is one thing your friends probably don’t know about you?
If I told you, it won’t be a secret anymore, will it?
Tagging: Everyone bored enough to do so.. drop me a note if you do it
Saturday, June 14, 2008
If you're in FaceBook, there's this Cause that really has good intentions, and I believe, is helping with changes, little by little.
It's called, 'To write love on her arms', and helps those struggling with depression, self-injury (read: self mutiliation) and thoughts of suicide.
I joined it when I first started out in Facebook and every now and then I would visit it, and read the posted messages. There'll be messages from people struggling, things like, "I've not cut myself for three weeks now, but I was really depressed today and wanted to do so," and there'll be some words of encouragement from people who actually do understand how tough it is. Kinda like, Cutting-Anonymous
It is really an addiction, you know.. you never quite really recover completely. The last time I played with a razor was (and thank goodness I'm at the stage where I've to think back really hard) when I was 17. Lol, I'll like to think I had a very good reason then - it was shortly after the abortion. So, yup.. 8 years ago. There was one stage when I'll remember very clearly, exactly, the number of days/weeks/months/years since the last time, so it is an improvement.
That's why I really felt this ache in my heart when I read a post by someone just now, someone who was basically crying out for help to know how to stop.. and I thought, more people need to know about this, hence this post.
I once wanted to slap a friend - somehow the conversation topic had shifted and she said, and I still remember, "People who cut themselves have nothing to do. They should just go and die."
It's some weird mental/emotional struggle that I cannot explain... but it's definitely not a case of having 'nothing to do'.
So if you're in Facebook, join this Cause, support what the good people are trying to do... be human.
It's called, 'To write love on her arms', and helps those struggling with depression, self-injury (read: self mutiliation) and thoughts of suicide.
I joined it when I first started out in Facebook and every now and then I would visit it, and read the posted messages. There'll be messages from people struggling, things like, "I've not cut myself for three weeks now, but I was really depressed today and wanted to do so," and there'll be some words of encouragement from people who actually do understand how tough it is. Kinda like, Cutting-Anonymous
It is really an addiction, you know.. you never quite really recover completely. The last time I played with a razor was (and thank goodness I'm at the stage where I've to think back really hard) when I was 17. Lol, I'll like to think I had a very good reason then - it was shortly after the abortion. So, yup.. 8 years ago. There was one stage when I'll remember very clearly, exactly, the number of days/weeks/months/years since the last time, so it is an improvement.
That's why I really felt this ache in my heart when I read a post by someone just now, someone who was basically crying out for help to know how to stop.. and I thought, more people need to know about this, hence this post.
I once wanted to slap a friend - somehow the conversation topic had shifted and she said, and I still remember, "People who cut themselves have nothing to do. They should just go and die."
It's some weird mental/emotional struggle that I cannot explain... but it's definitely not a case of having 'nothing to do'.
So if you're in Facebook, join this Cause, support what the good people are trying to do... be human.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Bloody hell...
Do you have days when you feel like maybe the whole world is against you? I do.
I just found out that my mum may have something in her breast… it’ll be two weeks before we will know for sure what it is… an agonizing two weeks.
And I wouldn’t have known if I hadn’t asked her about how she had spent yesterday. And she tells me casually that she had a check-up, a special check-up. And so on.
Already had one parent who had to battle cancer… if test results for this time are positive, I’m not sure how I would handle it..
It’s shit, you know… damn fucking idiotic bloody shit…
I just found out that my mum may have something in her breast… it’ll be two weeks before we will know for sure what it is… an agonizing two weeks.
And I wouldn’t have known if I hadn’t asked her about how she had spent yesterday. And she tells me casually that she had a check-up, a special check-up. And so on.
Already had one parent who had to battle cancer… if test results for this time are positive, I’m not sure how I would handle it..
It’s shit, you know… damn fucking idiotic bloody shit…
Monday, June 09, 2008
It's been an action-packed past two weeks... in fact, I think that's quite the understatement.
Did you know that by having lots of sex, one's complexion can improve? This works for females especially.
I'm happy to report that my complexion does seem much better now, lol. I think sex's a cheaper and definitely more enjoyable alternative to all those facial creams, toners and masks.
Parents will be back this week... once again, I countdown to their return with mixed feelings... it's good to have them around, but at the same time, oh the freedom!
Got a lot on my mind, some good, a lot bad... I don't like being in this state of constant worry; it makes me feel old beyond my years, and that's saying a lot coz I am quite the young thing *clears throat*
I don't really have anything to post... well actually I do, but I'm not in the mood to be Miss-fucking-tons-of-depth.
I just want to escape, you know.. run free.. sorta like the 'Born Free' song...
I'm going to get drunk sometime early july... bunch of old friends gathering for a chalet, and they've already told everyone who's travelling to buy DFS, as much as possible... lol. It's amazing... back in school, if someone had told me that this bunch would be an alcohol-guzzling group, I wouldn't have believed it. I would have been even more amazed if I was told that I would plan to get drunk with them sometime in the future.
Shows you just how life can be so unpredictable...
I miss Him..
I'm rambling...
Did you know that by having lots of sex, one's complexion can improve? This works for females especially.
I'm happy to report that my complexion does seem much better now, lol. I think sex's a cheaper and definitely more enjoyable alternative to all those facial creams, toners and masks.
Parents will be back this week... once again, I countdown to their return with mixed feelings... it's good to have them around, but at the same time, oh the freedom!
Got a lot on my mind, some good, a lot bad... I don't like being in this state of constant worry; it makes me feel old beyond my years, and that's saying a lot coz I am quite the young thing *clears throat*
I don't really have anything to post... well actually I do, but I'm not in the mood to be Miss-fucking-tons-of-depth.
I just want to escape, you know.. run free.. sorta like the 'Born Free' song...
I'm going to get drunk sometime early july... bunch of old friends gathering for a chalet, and they've already told everyone who's travelling to buy DFS, as much as possible... lol. It's amazing... back in school, if someone had told me that this bunch would be an alcohol-guzzling group, I wouldn't have believed it. I would have been even more amazed if I was told that I would plan to get drunk with them sometime in the future.
Shows you just how life can be so unpredictable...
I miss Him..
I'm rambling...
