SG Fairy

So I was having dinner by my lonesome self near home and this place had Class95 blasting from its speakers. Now, I adore Class95 - the DJs are great, the music I love... but those of you familiar with that radio station will know that on weekday evenings, there's 'Love Songs with Yaz'; nice DJ, and the music can be really good... but tonight, I wasn't quite feeling it, if you know what I mean.

He's back.. spent the whole of last night with Him *big fat grin*, and of course, today. It was a totally marvellous 'I-haven't-seen-you-for-eternity-and-want-every-second-stuck-to-you' time, almost worth all the petty squabbles we had online while He was away. Almost.

But still tonight, I had to make my own way home, alone. So you'll understand why I wasn't embracing Class95 tonight as I normally would do .

It's like I was telling a good friend over the weekend. I went to Batam for the weekend with 3 close girl friends and stayed in a fantastic resort. While two of them were showering, the girl and I sat on the balcony and chatted... I was giving her advice (The wonder! Me, giving relationship advice!) and I told her how a relationship with someone who's already attached/married can be bittersweet. I wouldn't trade my relationship with Him for anything in the world, and I do love Him very much.. but it is a bittersweet sort of love. You can have such good times with Him, but yet at the same time, you got to be prepared for the lonely times.

Of course, I would probably feel suffocated in a normal vanilla relationship - just imagine being with the guy all the time! I need my own personal space and time, time with my own friends etc, I value that very much... so in a way, my current relationship allows me that. BUT, at the same time, there are the sacrifices, like having to make your own way home while He goes home to His own family... and that can be difficult, especially when you've got a need for His presence.

Still, I guess with every relationship, there's the pros and the cons... and with this relationship I'm in, the pros far far far far outweight the cons. Haha, happy camper reporting!

Just sitting around looking at my girl friends this weekend, girls who went the conventional route (with both good and not-so-good results), I did wonder what it would have been like if I hadn't met Him and did the conventional dating and all. And you know, I think I would most probably still be single, and just casually dating around, aka. having casual fucks. I joked with Him once that I would like to aim to get into bed with at least one individual from each country in the world. After He pointed out that it would mean sleeping with people from certain countries I don't really like, I changed my mind and said that I'll instead aim to sleep with at least one individual from each and every Caucasian country (yeah, I'm racist that way, so sue me).

But that's me. I'm happy with that, but there are those who want different things. Like I told my friend, whatever it is that you choose, it's got to be something that's true to yourself. And once you've decided, you cannot waver. If you decide to fall in love, by all means fall in love. If you decide just to have a fling, have a great fling, but maybe sure you guard your heart. And if midway the circumstances are such that you decide to change your mind and go another route, there's the green light. But this above all, you have to be true to yourself, like the great Baron himself said.

I hope she understood that... wouldn't like to see her get hurt.

I still remember how painful a break-up can be.. you never really do forget, right?

Anyway..

I'm nursing 7 mozzie bites on my left leg and TEN on the other.. I counted. Batam's mozzies just love me. But still, I had a great time with those girls. All those years ago back in sec school, I never thought it would be possible to retain some of those friendships and actually go for a break with them 12 years into the friendship.

We paid ladies to climb all over us, touch us in intimate parts of our bodies... ah,such wonderful relaxing massages. Then we ate.. and then we sat around talking, reminising over the good old songs of our childhoods. We sang songs by idols we were crazy about as youths, evergreen love songs we heard in the 80s, and even nursey songs, lol, and NDP songs. It was an interesting night of "Hey, how does this song go, you know, the one with the chorus 'I just called to say I love you..." and then slowly, we remember bits and pieces of the song til we've formed the entire thing and we start singing it.

We also had great neighbors. We took the same ferry to Batam with this bunch of people whom I think are about our age.. and then the same ferry transfer to the resort... no exchanges of words, just smiles.. and then, when we got to our resort cottage and went exploring the rooms and got out to the balcony, we saw they were put in the cottage next to ours, out on the balcony too. And so over balcony rails, we waved to each other, exchanged greetings, and as the evening progressed, we were singing along to songs we were listengin to over our iPod, while the other group sang along to songs they were listening to on the laptop they had. Lol, our other neighbors must have hated us. And as we approached midnight, a bit of tequila was even passed over to us girls from that group... as well as well-wishes for a good night's rest when that group stumbled to bed totally high.

I could just imagine our neighbors, listening to us shouting "Good night, girls!" and "Good night, guys!", thinking, "You're jolly well damn right it's night! Now shut up already!"

Then, the next day, we all found ourselves in the same ferry transfer back to the terminal to take us home. We cracked jokes about our nights... and we said our goodbyes to each other as we arrived in SG.

It was really very heart-warming... because let's face it, S'poreans are generally not very friendly to strangers, even if they are people from the same country. But I guess, we are all young people of the similar 'kuan', or type, and so it was easy. I mean, they could have greeted us, and if we weren't like them, we could have just bolted and shut ourselves up in our rooms. But coz we were like them, we understood their friendliness and could and wanted to reciprocrate.

Plus, we're all young and in our twenties.. I think it's easier when you are younger, to behave like that. Sigh... so that means I've effectively got 5 more years til I hit 30, and may by then become less open and relaxed towards strangers. So, lol, that means for these 5 years, I've got to travel even more!

Any excuse for travel!

Hopefully, we girls will go travelling together again this Oct... plus, we said we'll dress up for Halloween this year! That'll be a laugh.

But hey, girls... really, thank you for a really great weekend.