SG Fairy

So this guy whom I thought was a potential fuck buddy but whom I never got around to jumping into bed with because either (a) we've been so busy in our individual lives it's hard to find a time we can both meet, or (b) he doesn't want me coz he thinks I sleep around too much (yes, I know, the irony - he fucks around but his 'girls' can't; and I don't even have as active a sex life with multiple partners as he does, even if I somehow give that impression), is now attached.

When I saw his blog post, I thought, "Darn! No chance liao!"

Then I remembered, since when did being attached ever stop him from fooling around? After all, his relationship with his last gf ended coz she caught him sleeping around and couldn't take it.

So, lol, I still got chance.

Not that I really do want to get in bed with him... He's a master flirt (that's a compliment by the way), we've done the whole heavy petting thingy, and there's this hint that if he's that good with petting, he must also be awesome in bed. That said, I don't know... something tells me I shouldn't get in bed with him, and my female instincts have never failed me, so far - I just get this feeling that if I do so, it'll complicate our friendship and I'll lose a friend. And I treasure my friendship with him more than I want to see if I'm proven right that he's good in bed.

See, I'm not that much a senseless raging pack of hormones after all. I can think! :P

Kinda amusing... to think that when we were young and innocent during our sec sch days, someone is untouchable if he/she is married/swings the other way/attached. Now, being attached or married doesn't stop anyone from trying to get more entertainment outside the relationship.

Yet, it's also sad, isn't it? Relationships no longer hold the same sort of awe and, dare I say, respect. Of course the more sex the better, but at the same time, I wonder if that means people these days no longer have the ability for meaningful relationships.

Then again, I'm living proof that you can be in a meaningful relationship and also have the freedom to explore. But the difference is, He knows and He encourages it - as perverse as that might sound to the saintly ones.

Do I make sense?

Anyway, I might have a date this Thursday... lol, and He's only just gone. But I am looking forward to it.. I like mysteries, and ok, so I am a little horny. Maybe we'll end up in bed at some point, maybe we'll just have a wonderful meal and conversation, maybe we'll never want to see each other again. But the point is, it is the entire process of meeting, exploring the person, that is the real orgasm.

It's a shame if people think that you can only have explosive sex if you're actually doing the deed. It's fun, yes, but there's more than just the thrusting. I find, a mental fuck is even more interesting. That's why we have this term 'flirting'.

Flirting is not just about talking someone into bed. You don't have to have the person in bed in order to be considered a good flirt - that's not the prize. But rather, flirting is about being confident, being able to engage in conversation, entice that person... playing a game.

It's all about the game, really.

But beyond that... let's not even talk about flirting. Even if you can't flirt (and I don't think I'm that great a flirt, rather clumsy more like), I hope you at least know how to hold your own in a conversation with anyone. Having a meaningful conversation is just as great.

I was joking with a friend that instead of going to SDU, I'm looking for dates via my blog now. But really, to tell the truth, in spite of all I say, it's not really a DATE. It's more a social meeting between two people whom have been impressed with each other through what they write/read. And I think, if you can gain a friend of some sort through this, that's even better than having sex - though the sex is a bonus, lol. But ultimately, I don't really expect anything out of it, except a new friendship. A 'harmless' contact, as he put it.

And I might have either just succeeded in making him cancel Thursday, or got him looking forward to it.

HA.

But anyway, I'm not really thinking much about it. I'm just bored, or rather, putting off my work. I hate Mondays... I'm not very productive on Mondays.. I rather blog aimlessly.

Urgh... I should get to work though.. I really should.

But before I go...

She kept nothing for night, for the bed. It was all in the open, on view. she was indeed the queen of the whores, enacting possession at every instant of her life, even while she ate; and when she played cards, she did not sit impassive, her body deprived of sensuality, as other women would sit with their attention on the game. One felt from the pose of her body, the way her ass spread on the seat, that everything was still set for possession. Her breasts almost touched the table with their fullness. If she laughed, then it was the sexual laugh of a satisfied woman, the laugh of a body enjoying itself through every pore, being caressed by the whole world.

:) I got three more Anais Nin books not too long ago. I'm rationing them again.

I hope one day, someone would think that about it, that without being crude, I was THE very symbol of sensuality, just through the simplest of acts.